WHEN THE STRESS IS JUST TOO BIG – DAY 7
“Before you know kindness as the deepest thing inside,
you must know sorrow as the other deepest thing.
You must wake up with sorrow.
You must speak to it till your voice
catches the thread of all sorrows
and you see the size of the cloth.
Then it is only kindness that makes sense anymore”
Naomi Shihab Nye
Kindness has been the theme through this series. When stress is too big – and the troubles of our lives put mindful breathing, eating or walking beyond reach – kindness is available to hold us.
Placing a hand onto our own pained heart or head is a moment of kindly care. Receiving the care of a best friend, or pet, or the kind wishes of unknown others, all ‘tune us’ into the frequency of kindness.
If we imagine kindness as invisible sounds waves surrounding us, it is our choice to tune in to the radio programme we want. We can choose to tune into the kindness of life all around us. It’s in all the places we don’t notice, because they are not dangerous and do not catch our attention (see the ‘Finding our feet’ 7-day mindfulness course). The kindness of spring sunshine brings the return of flowers.
While many mindfulness practices can (accidentally) feel like a ‘fix me’ project, kindness asks nothing of us other than to receive its tenderness. When stress and fear and worry say we ought to be better, kindness says, “I love you just as you are”.
Inspirational Poem
Naomi Shihab Nye: Kindness
Before you know what kindness really is
you must lose things,
feel the future dissolve in a moment
like salt in a weakened broth.
What you held in your hand,
what you counted and carefully saved,
all this must go so you know
how desolate the landscape can be
between the regions of kindness.
How you ride and ride
thinking the bus will never stop,
the passengers eating maize and chicken
will stare out the window forever.
Before you learn the tender gravity of kindness,
you must travel where the Indian in a white poncho
lies dead by the side of the road.
You must see how this could be you,
how he too was someone
who journeyed through the night with plans
and the simple breath that kept him alive.
Before you know kindness as the deepest thing inside,
you must know sorrow as the other deepest thing.
You must wake up with sorrow.
You must speak to it till your voice
catches the thread of all sorrows
and you see the size of the cloth.
Then it is only kindness that makes sense anymore,
only kindness that ties your shoes
and sends you out into the day to mail letters and
purchase bread,
only kindness that raises its head
from the crowd of the world to say
it is I you have been looking for,
and then goes with you every where
like a shadow or a friend.
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